Autism – Jeff Snyder, Autism/Neurodiversity Self-Advocate and Public Speaker

Blog #430: Cheering for the Underdog at Graduation

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Just the other day, I came across this picture on Facebook and looking at it gave me the idea for a blog centered around this one picture. You see, we are now at the point where schools and colleges are preparing for graduation activities whether they be proms, senior class trips and final exams. For the students graduating, its a both exciting time and a very nerve-wracking time on account that they will now be facing life after high school or after college.

But looking at this picture, I couldn’t help but notice something that I witness every year since my graduation in 2007: most of the students that get all the attention are students who are the top of their classes, the straight A students, the students who were in all the clubs and yet, not everyone focuses on the students who were on an Individual Education Plan throughout their educational journey.

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As you know if you’ve been following me is that every year I present the “Jeffrey Snyder Go the Distance” Scholarship and each year, I always witness the top students get all the top awards such as valedictorian and salutatorian. They are the ones who get awarded the most and while that’s fine for them, there are the students who seem to be left under the rug. For teachers, those particular students aren’t the main focus because they had behavior problems or just weren’t as important.

Now, when I graduated from Seekonk High School in 2007, I probably should have been one of those students who probably never got anything aside from the high school diploma. Sure, I got my diploma, but I also got the Principal’s Leadership Award and the Student Leadership Award. Those were the two top awards below the valedictorian and salutatorian awards. Prior to then, there were likely no other special education students who were awarded on that type of level, which goes to show you just how rare it was.

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Another factor I notice is that most, if not all students who are top ranking in their graduation class are often pressured, if not driven to succeed by others around them. If anything, about 90% of the top graduates probably didn’t need the pressure nor any extra scrutiny. They probably didn’t ask for the attention and often would just be happy living being able to walk across the stage.

In fact, just walking across the stage to get your diploma is another accomplishment onto itself, especially if the student has social anxieties. Just drawing up the courage to walk across the stage at graduation is an even greater accomplishment onto itself. A couple of years ago, I read a story about how the entire graduation ceremony went silent for a graduating neurodivergent student who had a fear of loud noises just so he can walk across the stage to receive his diploma.

If that doesn’t explain anything, what else does?

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All of this goes to show you that it isn’t about the top dogs at graduation that we should be paying attention to. Special Education students also have their own Everest to climb and it’s important for educators of all levels to be there to acknowledge the student for all his or her efforts to get to that moment.

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Catch you all later!!

Blog #429: Knowing My Limits As A Neurodivergent

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If you have been following me for a while now, you know that I am someone who feels like I need to do everything for the sake of “Going the Distance.” This ultimately would sometimes lead to burnouts and meltdowns because I feel like everything that needs to get done, should get done.

But because of my neurodivergent nature, I have been at times unable to display the fact that I need to step back and say to myself that I need to realize my limits.

That is, of course, as of recent when if you have visited my event albums page, you will see that I had a button for an album of Boca School for Autism’s Family Fun Night on April 11th where it would be watching a Florida Panthers hockey game. The Sunday before I was supposed to come down, I suddenly began to get a feeling that maybe this wasn’t going to be the right fit. I mean, what was I going to get from going to a hockey game? It would be noisy and overstimulating and not in the environment that I would normally find myself in.

Now, as you also know, I don’t like to make any cancellations or rescheduling’s unless it’s needed. However, from what I was hearing in terms of getting transportation to being up late at night, it just wasn’t worth it.

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Keep in mind also that there has been a lot going on in my life as of late considering that I have been getting to know a life coach/personal advocate from one of the organizations in Massachusetts as well as waiting to hear back about a possible job opportunity for the past two weeks. Not to mention that my primary care doctor is retiring, and I wanted to make my final appointment with him a good one as well as having done two trips up to the Boston metro area for Flutie related events.

So, you can see where I am coming from?

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But this is not the first time where I have started to realize my limits. As I had transitioned from attending Brony Conventions to learn my profession as a public speaker, I knew that not everyone is going to like what I have to offer and after 2021, I decided to walk away from Brony and Fan Conventions for good.

There is a lot of money, sweat and tears that go into making these events possible on my part and I knew that if I wasn’t going to be paid for speaking at them, then what good was it?

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Finally, I feel that knowing my limits has sort of helped me become a better individual and much better business owner. I’ve also started embracing doing more virtual and local speaking events/trainings as well as national ones that fit with what I have to offer. It’s not easy, but sometimes it is necessitated not just for today, but for tomorrow too.

There may be something that you may need to trust your instincts for in terms of knowing your limits. If you feel like you know your limits, by all means, say it even though you don’t really want to. Don’t do something that is going to bring you down at the end because it just isn’t worth it.

Take it from me, knowing your limits may be the best thing that you can do in your life!!

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Catch you all later!!

“Going the Distance” Event Review: Profound Autism Summit at the Boston Marriott Burlington in Burlington, MA on Friday April 5th, 2024

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Following my promotion of “School Safety Drills and Autism” on April 3rd up in Newton, MA, I next travelled up to Burlington, MA for the Profound Autism Summit that was hosted by the Profound Autism Alliance based in the Boston Metro Area.

Now, this is going to be slightly different from the previous review in Newton whereas instead of doing a training, I was running a table for the Doug Flutie Jr. Foundation for Autism. Of course, I wanted to do whatever I can to help make Flutie successful and that includes manning tables as needed.

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To give you a little context of the Profound Autism Summit, this was a conference hosted by the Profound Autism Alliance based in Boston, MA for families and caregivers of those who are profoundly neurodivergent (if I labeled anyone, I apologize) and who need 24/7 care for the rest of their lives. You can also say that this was a summit for families of individuals who are profoundly neurodivergent but have some level of success (such as having a job or taking public transportation), although they will still need 24/7 style care in various areas.

Fortunately, I have not been able to be like some of those families affected by profound autism, but attending this conference made do quite a bit of thinking in regards of whether or not that profound neurodiverse families could benefit from what I have to offer at “Going the Distance.”

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Sitting amongst all the organizations that were in Burlington made me think that there could be something profound neurodivergent families can learn from such as if the student in public school or if the family can’t seem to find a way to connect with the individual.

I mean, dealing with someone who is profoundly neurodivergent is a job in itself. Eventually, we have to accept that individuals who are profoundly neurodivergent might never achieve the levels we either expect or not such as living on their own, having a job or even having a social network. Every single one of the people who attended the summit were in that boat.

But these families never give up and I don’t give up on them. This is why I look at someone affected by profound autism and say to them that there is always something to be achieved. This is the case with Patrick Linehan, a neurodivergent artist and member of the Flutie Foundation’s spectrum of sound. The fact that he is an artist and being in a group of other neurodivergent singers is a sign that he has achieved the accomplishments that were on his level.

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The truth of the matter is that there many profound neurodivergent families that need resources to turn to help them cope with the challenges and the fears that they have. I feel that being amongst this summit might have given me a possible new audience to share my trainings with. I mean, we all want what is best for our loved ones and it’s not easy having limited resources.

I mean, how else do we feel when we struggle with bringing our neurodivergent loved ones to say the doctor’s office or to a house of worship or even why they love material that will otherwise be more suited towards younger children? Well, I do offer those trainings because no matter how small, you can help loved ones achieve that goal that you want to help them seek.

Autism/Neurodiversity Family and Individual Trainings

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Navigating neurodiversity is never easy and I continue to feel that events like the Profound Autism Summit sends a message that there are places for families to turn to if they need the resources. Autism will continue to be a part of our society and culture whether we like it or not and it’s up to those like me or who attended the summit to keep those resources coming.

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Catch you all later!!

“Going the Distance” Event Review: Doug Flutie Jr. Foundation for Autism Law Enforcement Summit at William James College in Newton, MA on Wednesday April 3rd, 2024

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Earlier this month, I had the honor of taking part in two events hosted by the Doug Flutie Jr. Foundation for Autism where the first of the two was a summit hosted in conjunction with William James College in Newton, Massachusetts on Wednesday April 3rd, 2024.

Now when it comes to the neurodiversity community and law enforcement, there is a fine line that tends to not be made smoothly on account that there is a lack of training and awareness for how law enforcement encounters a neurodivergent individual. Very often, we hear stories about how there are tragic consequences concerning neurodivergent/developmentally different individuals in the news, and sometimes the results we get about these consequences can vary on the part of the officer or the part of the individual.

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Of course, that concern also extends to public schools and that was part of the reason why I attended this summit which was to promote “School Safety Drills and Autism” to these brave men and women. Most recently, schools have been installing police officers as school resource officers in response to various tragedies that have happened in our nation’s schools as well as to show some extra authority to the student population.

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Still, the special education population tends to be an area of concern, considering that there are neurodivergent/developmentally different students, who while capable of being amongst neurotypical peers, can have a tendency to say wander off in the event of a school safety drill.

The school resource officer assigned might not be trained in dealing with neurodivergent/developmentally different students if they decide to elope or escape. The officer might assume that the student is a threat and will use their traditional methods to communicate with the student…especially if the student cannot respond to verbal commands.

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Autism Self-Advocate Sam Kanji and his mom, Ilese

Since I became a Flutie fellow in the Fall of 2022, I have been closely involved with supporting families and individuals impacted by autism/neurodiversity and some of those families have been impacted by profound autism. When I say, “profound autism,” I mean that the individual might not speak or display behaviors that could seem as threatening to the officer.

Without the training and awareness of law enforcement, tragedies can happen and I feel that this summit is just one of many that needs to transpire across the country because it’s not just schools but anywhere at any time that neurodivergent families/individuals can cross paths, even at the most strangest of times. One of the individuals who spoke was Sam Kanji and his mother Ilyse, who told a story of how Sam had touched their alarm system and law enforcement was sent to their house resulting in chaos.

While this was clearly a case of a false alarm, it does raise the question of how things could have gone in a situation where the officer wasn’t as understanding to how sensitive the individual is? Listening to this made me think that there could be a family out there who is affected by autism/neurodiversity and the officer treats this like any other situation without realizing the developmental difference that this family deals with.

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Of course, it’s all about building bridges between law enforcement and the autism/neurodiversity community, especially now in this day and age where a lot of police officers are judged based on their actions without understanding the full context. If more trainings and summits like this are held, then the bridges could be built on a longer scale that will benefit law enforcement and the autism/neurodiversity community for the long term.

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It’s also important to remember that some of the police officers who attended are actually parents/guardians of neurodivergent/developmentally different individuals, so they can understand the pain and frustration some families go through. They know what it’s like to see their neurodivergent loved one wander off or display behaviors that can affect others which makes events like this so important both in the classroom and out in the community.

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Catch you all later!!

Doug Flutie Jr. Foundation for Autism Law Enforcement Summit at William James College in Newton, MA on Wednesday April 3rd, 2024

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Photos taken from my promotion of “School Safety Drills and Autism” at the Doug Flutie Jr. Foundation for Autism Law Enforcement Summit on Wednesday April 3rd, 2024

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Heading up to William James College in Newton, MA

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Dr. Sarah Abbott of William James College giving opening remarks

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Flutie Fellow and Cancer Survivor Jonathan Gardner

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As you can see, this wasn’t a full training

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Deputy Chief and Autism Parent Sean Riley

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Proud to have these law enforcement officers in attendance

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Closing remarks from Dr. Nicholas Cavino, William James College President

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Doug Flutie Jr. Foundation for Autism/Going the Distance Table Exhibition at Profound Autism Summit in Burlington, MA on Friday April 5th, 2024

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Photos taken from the Doug Flutie Jr. Foundation for Autism/Going the Distance Table Exhibition at the inaugural Profound Autism Summit which took place at the Boston Marriott Burlington in Burlington, MA on Friday April 5th, 2024

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Heading up to the Boston Marriott Burlington in Burlington, MA

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Yes, there are McDonald’s locations right on the side of the highway

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Blog #428: Why I Applaud “Adventures with Iggy and Mr. Kirk” As a Neurodivergent

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Let me tell you something regarding children’s programming…it’s a far cry from what I experienced growing up in the 1990’s. Shows like “Sesame Street” and “Mr. Rogers” taught important life lessons that we were able to absorb like a sponge and use in our lives as we grew up. Being a neurodivergent, I was always very self-aware of what I was watching and while I did use my imagination to see the story as I saw fit, I never forgot the true lessons of what the story was about.

Children’s television nowadays are almost more about money and viewership and less about teaching what is important. Not to say that there are some long running programs that have broken innovations like “Sesame Street” while still trying to hold onto those values. But for the most part, all children’s programming are basically cash cows and that’s raising a lot of red flags. Most of today’s programming for children are teaching the same thing over and over again while also bringing in topics that should not be taught at such a young age.

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Now, the reason I am talking about children’s programming in this blog is because many neurodivergent individuals will still watch programs on PBS, Disney Channel or Nickelodeon even as adults and while most families will display anxiety or apprehension towards it, they are probably wishing that individuals watch something that is of value along the lines of “Mister Rogers Neighborhood.”

When I first saw this new crowdfunded program being advertised YouTube called “Iggy and Mr. Kirk,” it got me thinking that maybe this is the programming that today’s family needs to watch and embrace even if it is only going to be for 20 episodes. You’ve got Kirk Cameron (star of “Growing Pains”) and a muppet type character named Iggy the Iguana hosting a show that holds value that children can take into their everyday lives.

Lessons like being brave and strong, accepting responsibility for our actions amongst others are still being taught, but they are being taught the wrong way. The minds of children and the few neurodivergent individuals who watch them are fragile and they need to be treated as fragile. Working in a public setting has made me see that none of these lessons are being applied and to have someone like Kirk Cameron step forward to apply these lessons is a breath of fresh air.

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Now that is to say that not all children’s programming today is bad, I mean there are a few diamonds in the rough like “My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic” that also taught important life lessons like trusting your instincts (“A Canterlot Wedding”); giving someone a second chance (“The Cutie Re-Mark”) or what happens when we stray from the true path and we end up betraying others (“Twilight’s Kingdom”) while maintaining the core lesson of friendships.

But when it comes to “Iggy and Mr. Kirk,” it seems like we are getting something back that once was around a long time ago, something that we embraced and took into our adult lives. If you see it, give it a chance. You will not be disappointed!!

“Adventures with Iggy and Mr. Kirk” Promo Page

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Catch you all later!!

Blog #427: An Explanation About the Meaning Behind the “Going the Distance” Logo

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If you have been following me since the beginning or just starting to follow me as a neurodiversity ambassador/public speaker, you might be wondering yourself one question: why does “Going the Distance” have a logo that is in the form of a traffic signal?

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For those of you who follow me that are in the field of behavioral analysis or psychology or even psychiatry, you should know that the traffic signal represents an individual’s self-regulation. But there is more to that because I selected a logo for “Going the Distance” for a very specific purpose.

You see, there is more than just a traffic light that makes up the logo for Going the Distance. Each color of the traffic light represents a level in which an individual and/or a family is willing to go in order to achieve a goal in life. These goals can range from getting a car and driving it, moving out of the house and living on that individual’s own or even doing basic survival skills such as cooking meals, doing the laundry, keeping house or even getting a job. Each color represents as follows:

#1: Red Light

Taking a look at the red light in the “Going the Distance” logo, this light represents families and individuals that would much rather be resistant to change or achieving life goals. There are some developmentally different individuals in today’s society that clearly don’t qualify to accept any life challenges or goals. These range from those who cannot speak and/or communicate to those who just don’t have the basic functions to live independently. Those who also end up going into a group home or dayhab program also potentially qualify for this list.

The red light also qualifies towards families that have a deep fear for their loved ones because they think the individual cannot thrive towards a specific goal when they really can or are willing to do so. I’ve actually met and known several families that would much rather be in the red light on account of the family dynamic simply because they would much rather have their child live according to the needs of the family and not the individual, even if the individual may seem like he or she is ready to achieve a specific goal.

The same also goes for families who believe in medical professionals that say that their child would never amount to anything. I was one of several individuals in this community that was told that I would never achieve anything past a certain age, but I proved them wrong!!

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#2: Yellow Light

Moving onto the Yellow Light portion of the “Going the Distance” logo, this is the light where you have a developmentally different individual or family that want to achieve a specific goal, but have a sense of anxiety and/or hesitation towards that goal. There is always that fear of wanting to achieve the goal, but what if something goes wrong? What if something were to happen?

These thoughts that developmentally different individuals and their families would have would classify as a form of caution…being not totally fearful, but still fearful nonetheless. An example would be that the individual would want to go somewhere on his or her own, but they don’t drive.

You are a parent or guardian that has the fear that something might happen or even the individual him or herself has that nagging fear of what happens if something bad were to happen? Another example would be what were to happen if the individual would want to cook his or her own meals? What if they cut themselves with the knife or what if they burn themselves on the oven? What if they don’t clean up after they are done cooking the meals?

Essentially, those in the yellow light just need a little extra support into getting the goal achieved which is the area of my own logo that I’ve been in for most of my life. You might also be in the yellow light for the rest of your life and while it is frustrating, it’s somewhat true.

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#3: Green Light

The final light in the “Going the Distance” Logo is the light that we all want to be at, but there are some that might never make it right away or at all and that is the green light. The green light means that the individual can achieve anything that he or she sets his or her heart’s desire towards or finally achieving a specific goal in life that the individual and his or her family have been working on.

Now when it comes to the green light, most people will say they will only get to the green light if they complete college, get married and start a family or achieve a specific high-ranking position in a job or something.

That is clearly not true because getting to the green light can range from a variety of approaches as obtaining an apartment, being able to take public transportation individually or even being involved in a social event. Take a look at the green light as a representation of achieving towards completing a goal that you have been stuck in the red or yellow lights trying to achieve.

Again, there is no specific goal that is included in the green light because it can be a whole range of goals both big and small or long or short term.

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So that is a look at a better understanding of the “Going the Distance” logo and why it is in the form of a traffic light. In conclusion, just remember that I am not trying in any way to label anyone, but rather just trying to give a visualization of how we can achieve goals and live our lives. However, we all probably don’t want to be in the red light and can only get as far as the yellow light and that’s okay. Remember that while we all want to strive to get into the green light, getting into the green light doesn’t happen overnight.

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Catch you all later!!

Blog #426: My Neurodivergent Recation to the Nickelodeon Documentary “Quiet on Set.”

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Before I begin this blog, I wanted to warn you all that some of what I will be talking about can be bothersome to some of you reading this. So, viewer discretion is advised.

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So, to begin with, I was a big fan of Nickelodeon during the late 1990s and early 2000’s. Some of the shows I used to watch included the Nicktoon shows liked “Rugrats” and “Rocko’s Modern Life” as well as the game shows like “Nick Arcade, “GUTS,” and “Legends of the Hidden Temple.” I also had been a fan of some of their live action programming such as “All That!” and “Kenan and Kel.”

But little did I know or anyone else know that skeletons were hidden in the closet and this new documentary brought those skeletons out of the closet.

When I watched “Quiet on Set,” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing that the kids I grew up watching like Amanda Bynes and Katrina Johnson were treated so poorly by Nickelodeon’s golden boy, Dan Schneider and several other people. Being a neurodivergent individual, I can see how some people, particularly child stars can get taken advantage of by others simply because they were vulnerable and others who saw them as golden geese or cash cows.

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Now, I have seen people in the news and even in my everyday life get taken advantage of by others and treated so badly either because the people who abuse are weak minded and feel a sense of entitlement. In fact, “Rugrats” had a living breathing example of someone who was very abusive to individuals smaller than them and that was Angelica Pickles.

When I first saw “Quiet on Set,” all I could think of was Angelica and the fact that people like Dan Schneider were essentially a personfication of Angelica while Tommy Pickles and his friends were essentially a personification of the victims.

Now, Angelica is someone who thinks she can do as she pleases because she’s older than the babies. In a way, I could see that with someone like Dan Schneider because he was the boss of these child actors, he could do as he wanted. It’s important to remember that power and authority can only get you so far and this is something that I have seen in my day job where there have been people fighting for promotions and they would treat underlings like me like as nothing.

Although it never went to those extremes at my day job, this documentary does serve as a warning to all workplaces on how to better treat their employees. If there is one thing that I have ZERO tolerance for is inappropriate behavior on others and boundaries getting crossed. Just because you make a ton of money and have all the power in the world, it does not make you invincible to get what you want.

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In fact, this was part of the reason why I left the Brony Fandom after “Friendship is Magic” ended five years ago, because there were some people in the fandom that were shady and felt like they could get away with anything. Hell, there were even people in the neurodiversity community who felt that because they were neurodivergent, they couldn’t face the consequences of their actions. Maybe it was because they couldn’t see that their actions were hurting others and kept on doing it (like I did when I tried my hand at dating) or it could be that they felt a sense of empowerment.

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All this ultimately leads back to the “Quiet on Set” documentary and the fact is that when people that followed you for so many years see your true colors, they will never view you the same way again. Now, I can’t watch Nickelodeon without thinking of the horrors that went on behind the scenes. As good as Nickelodeon was, I can’t fully endorse anyone who doesn’t treat their workforce with dignity and respect.

Will I still watch the shows Nickelodeon made in the 1990s and early 2000s? Yes and no on account of solidarity with the people who had to endure this kind of behavior. When we go into the workplace, we are to be treated with respect because the success of something doesn’t materialize if the workers are treated badly whether they are neurodivergent or not.

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Catch you all later!!

Blog #425: Filing Out Forms As a Neurodivergent

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Just recently, I have been applying for life support through my state’s main autism organization and part of the process involved filling out 11 pages of forms that detail information and other tidbits about myself. Now being a neurodivergent adult, I have filled out thousands and thousands of forms and signed plenty of papers that needed signatures, but it gives me a chance to really sit down and think how a process like this can be viewed from a neurodivergent perspective.

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For one thing, filling out forms while can be too much to process, are necessary especially when it comes to something like medical records, etc. Doctors especially want to have records of you so they can get to know who you are and what you are. To do that, they usually have their patients fill out paperwork that can otherwise be viewed as unnecessary.

Now, one thing about forms and other documents is that ALWAYS need to be done properly and most neurodivergents would often rush through these documents so that they can get it done and get on with their lives.

However, that is not the case in any way!

Not everything in life can be done so easily and when we fill out documentation, it’s important to carefully study the document and realize just what we are getting ourselves into. I mean, we probably will want something that we so desire like a car, but there is the matter of paperwork that needs to be filled out for insurance, liability, etc.

The chances are that if we want to drive the car, then we need to sign the papers. If we are to have something fixed, we need to sign the consent for the doctor to work on us. It’s a lot to understand, I get it, but when we sign documentation, we oftentimes need additional support to fill it out and for some neurodivergents, it’s not easy to swallow pride and accept help from others.

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Chances are that when it comes to document signing, there does need to be continued education and training for neurodivergents because filling out important papers is like a work of art: it can’t be rushed and it can’t be shortcutted.

Now, a good visual example of this is in Disney’s “The Little Mermaid” (1989) where it’s basically a whole song about signing a contract, a contract that can have rammifications if not studied correctly. But, Ariel was so blinded by her desire to be a human, that she serves as an example of what happens when our impatience gets the better of our judgement to study what is on the written print.

“Poor Unfortunate Souls” from “The Little Mermaid” (1989)

Ariel becomes human from “The Little Mermaid” (1989)

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In conclusion, when it comes to documents, I get it that they are a pain to fill out.

But it’s gotta get done when the moment calls for it however there are ways to ease the stress of filling them out. Still, it’s important to remember that some DON’T HAVE TO BE FILLED OUT RIGHT AWAY! While some do need to be signed and returned like a school progress report, others do not have a deadline and thus can be filled out in their own good time. But they can be signed together with a support system, if only the individual is willing to let that happen.

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Catch you all later!!